Paris is Pregnant

I can’t confirm the statement which makes up the title of this post, caught your attention though, right? All day long, one of the top searches on Technorati has been “paris hilton pregnant”. Who the fuck cares? I can’t honestly believe that many people are searching to find out if Paris is pregnant. She’s a cumslut attention whore who shouldn’t even be allowed to breed.

This just reminded me of the South Park that was on Comedy Central lastnight. Paris and Mr. Slave have a “whore-off” to see who the biggest whore is. Paris whips out a pineapple and proceeds to sit on the pineapple until nothing but the top is sticking out from under her skirt. Then Mr. Slave owns her by taking off his pants, holds his cock in his hand, and jumps on Paris’s head, making her disappear within his ass.

The point is, Americans and pop-culture types in general shouldn’t give Paris any more attention than she deserves. Yes, she’s probably preggo. She’s probably no stranger to being preggo, abortion seems like it’d be her kind of thing.

South Park was trying to get the message across that parents shouldn’t allow their kids to act like Paris. Parents shouldn’t even allow their young children to know of her existance. Pretty soon we’ll have third graders running around in tube tops and thongs…as was the case in South Park.

It still baffles me that this is one of the top searches on Technorati, and has been all day. I shouldn’t be surprised though, people are retards.

Seriously though, I can’t even find one reliable source reporting that Paris is preggo. What the fuck makes people search for shit like this? That’s what I wanna know. Must be on the National Enquirer or some shit like that, like “Bush’s Booze Cricis” was.

UPDATE: A few blogs are taking note of this, mostly just taking note that “paris hilton pregnant” is a technorati top search. Technorandom says it’s undoubtedly a lie…in a very sarcastic way. And JensOfNorway would like to let everyone know you can place wagers on topics like this, and supposedly make a decent amount of money. Uncle Fire takes basically the same approach that I took: People are fucking stupid for even paying attention to shit like this. I include myself in the “fucking stupid” group, otherwise I wouldn’t even be writing about this.

Oh, I think this post would make a good dessert with Basil’s lunch…gotta be about supper time though. Might as well participate in the Mudville Gazette open post too, along with Jo’s Cafe (TGIF Specials) and Cafe Oregano.


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4 thoughts on “Paris is Pregnant

  1. Too funny- I’m laughing at this and haven’t even seen the southpark episode. That’s gotta be a gut-splitter…
    I’ll have to try and catch a rerun of of the southpark.

  2. cumslut attention whore
    shouldn’t be allowed to breed
    Paris crammed into Mr. Slave’s ass

    All great comments, although the greatest line in your post is “Who the fuck cares?”

    My God, ain’t her 15 minutes of fame long gone? If that leather-like twat that smells like last Tuesday’s carp stopped breathing this very moment would anyone really care? She is a goddess only in her own mind, and someone needs to tell her that the rest of the world is laughing AT her, not WITH her. Geez.

  3. Shamalama, your comment rivals the entirety of my post in humor. “smells like last Tuesday’s carp” is almost too good. Way more original than mine. Nice job.


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